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Wed, January 28, 2009 7:42 am By sarah
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WHY THEY CHEAT?
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48% of men rated emotional discontent as the primary reason they cheated.
So much for the fable that for men, cheating is all about bodily intimacy: Only 8 percent of men said that physical displeasure was the main factor in their infidelity. “Our civilization tells us that all men want to be happy is to have physical intimacy with someone,” Neuman says. “But men are sensitively driven beings too. They desire their wives to show them that they’re respected, and they want women to recognize how hard they’re trying to get things accurate.” The trouble is that men are less likely than women to express these feelings, so you won’t forever know when your guy is in need of a little avowal. “Most men believe it unmanly to ask for a pat on the back, which is why their emotional needs are often ignored,” Neuman says. “But you can form a marital culture of appreciation and attention and once you set the tone, he’s likely to equal it.”
66% of cheating men account feeling guilt during the affair.
The implications are a slight scary: It isn’t just indifferent jerks that cheat. In fact, 68 percent of cheaters never dreamed they’d be disloyal, and almost all of them wished they hadn’t done it, Neuman says. Obviously, guilt isn’t enough to stop a man from cheating. “Men are excellent at compartmentalizing feelings,” “They can hold on to their emotions and pact with them later.” So even if your spouse swears he would never cheat, don’t suppose it can’t happen. It’s significant for both of you to take steps toward creating the relationship, you wish for
77% of cheating men have a good friend who also cheated.
Hanging around in the midst of friends who go astray makes cheating seem normal and legitimizes it as a possibility. The message he’s subconsciously telling himself: “My pal is a good guy who happens to be devious on his wife. I guess even the best of us does it?” You can’t simply prohibit your husband from hanging out with Mr. Wandering Eyes, , but you can ask for that they spend their time together in an environment that offers less temptation, like at a honorable event or a restaurant for lunch rather than at a bar or club. Another approach: put together your social circle around happily married couples that contribute to your values — it’ll create an environment that wires marriage.





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