When anyone in a relationship sits down to examine hi/her relationship the first thing that we notice is the diminishing attraction. Many people face there relation turning sour. We can not understand the root cause of things taking a different shape.

What is this evil thing?
Think about it. When you first start in on a relationship, you do certain things naturally to avoid looking like you are too needy or desperate. You go on a date once every week or two initially instead of seeing the person daily right after you’ve first met. You try to space apart your calls and not call ten times a day. You try to slowly let the person find out about you as opposed to giving them a full biography when you first meet. You do all these things, right? And all these rituals serve to pace the relationship and create a sense of wanting more. In other words, people intrinsically understand that they need to have balance and self control in order to create attraction in the initial stages of dating.

However, often as people become closer and their personal space becomes more entangled with their partner as the relationship progresses, they start to lose this sense of balance and self control, which often manifests itself in needy and clingy behavior. This is something that must be avoided at all costs, since this is the biggest killer of attraction. This bears repeating- needy behavior is by far the biggest destroyer of relationships, probably even more so than infidelity.  The qualities that made you attractive to your partner in the beginning of the relationship are now abandoned, and when the exact opposite qualities are displayed, what happens? You guessed it- the opposite of attraction.

WHAT TO DO
So, how can these kinds of needy, clingy behavior by avoided? And how exactly is needy behavior displayed?  First, neediness stems from a lack of identity. Whenever you catch yourself thinking “I can’t live without this person” or “How awful my life would be without this person” you are well on your way to losing your personal identity within the relationship. A relationship requires the love, cooperation and shared life of two individuals, but they are still individuals. Once you start feeling like you are losing your own individuality, you definitely are on the wrong track and must take a step backward and reflect.

Neediness starts with a state of mind. How does this attitude express itself outwardly? Because you are losing your identity, you start to crowd your partner’s free time and personal space. Constantly seeking their attention, not giving them space, constantly worrying about the relationship, calling excessively, asking insecure questions, showing irrational jealousy or possessiveness, panicking if you are apart, etc, are all good examples of needy behavior. Remember, neediness is an irrational mindset. The needy individual feels like they are losing control, so they try harder to regain that control. Unfortunately, instead of helping the relationship, it only serves to push the other person further away.

Remember the kiss of death to any relationship is needy behavior. It all starts with a mindset involving loss of control and individuality.  The best way to rectify this if you find yourself slipping down this slippery slope is to recognize your initial thought patterns and stop them before they affect your behavior. In the end, actions stem from feelings, and feeling come from thoughts. You are in control of your thoughts, so you’re emotions is a choice.

When two people are in a serious relationship, apart from being the emotional and financial support of each other, physical intimacy is also a key factor that shapes up on its own with time. If two people are deeply in love with each other, then it is very difficult for them to avoid physical intimacy. Never believe if any couple say that they never got physically intimate, yet emotionally they are close. Emotional aspect is very important for love to flourish, but don’t lay the entire stress on that individually. Physical interaction is important, but the extent of intimacy depends on the couple, as to how much close they would like to get, comfortably.

Here, what becomes important is that, the physical interaction should be pleasurable for both, as it is not a one sided affair. It can’t be that, one person likes it while the other person is feels disgusted. Then that becomes really ugly can lead to the end of the relationship. To be more precise, one should focus on the quality of intimacy and not the quality. It’s not how many times you get close that counts, it is the feeling you get every time you get close. Intimacy is considered important as; this way you make your partner understand how much you love him/her.

It is a way of expressing the intensity of love you feel for your soul mate. So, the interaction should be a result of the feelings that come straight from your heart that makes you filled with peace and spirituality. To ensure a healthy intimate relation, communication is a key factor. You should speak out to your partner as to what kind of touch you like and what you dislike. If you know and follow the soft points that make your lover feel elated, then this will make every moment beautiful. But like stated before, you will have to maintain the limits up to which your closeness will reach.

The feeling that will be able to satisfy your desires is to feel love while making love with your partner. It’s like even if you look into the person’s eyes, cuddle up next to each other and holding on to each other with that loving smile on your lips, you should experience a heavenly feeling deep inside. If you get such a feeling, you will attain true fulfillment and will experience the beauty of a true love relationship.

If you are charming and glamorous you will be able to attract more men towards you. If you want your guy to only concentrate on you, you will need to work on your personality and be more charming and attractive so that his full attention is on you. It’s your personality that needs a complete make over if you want to change yourself. Once you change yourself you will be the centre of attraction for all good looking men around.

The following tips will help you become a charming person:

Make Changes on the way you dress by wearing the right colors, clothes and cosmetics. Don’t wear anything and everything that is in fashion; choose clothes that suit your personality and make you look elegant and classy.Never over do your make up; it might make you look loud.

Maintain a practice of greeting people when you see them. This is a major trait of your personality which many men might be fond of. Greet then with a firm handshake this is indicative of the fact that you are pleased to meet them.

Make Changes to the way you stand and sit. Try and stand straight and tall with straight shoulders. This will show that you are confident, responsible and not confused in life. Always sit back straight; your shoulders should not be drooping.

Be relaxed when you meet different men. If your are tensed they might not like to talk to you.

Make eye contact with people while you talk to them, this will show that you are sure of everything you talking about and that you are well informed .Never forget that men are fond of intelligent women.

Always walk straight with your head held high.

Choose the beat hair style for yourself that compliments your personality.

Have a smiling face so that you seem approachable to people.

When you someone asks his name start using it right away.

Without wasting anytime time you just need to pull up your socks and start working on your personality to improve yourself in all respects.